Why Politics is More than Left vs. Right

And why I nerded out completely and tried to chart political ideologies into Excel.

It’s one of the oldest tricks in the political grifter’s playbook: oversimplify absolutely everything to within an inch of its life. Turn deeply complex ideologies into buzzwords. Reduce centuries of nuanced thought into neat little boxes labelled “good” and “evil” (or “patriot” and “woke commie groomer,” depending on who’s talking). And who benefits from this? The loudest voices in the room—the Farages, Trumps, and their hangers on—who weaponise simplicity to push their narratives.

But here’s something I learnt while writing Bear Necessities—politics is messy. It’s not just a tug-of-war between Left and Right or a Montague-and-Capulet-style feud between capitalists and communists. Politics spans ideologies, contradictions, and ideas so diverse they barely fit in one Excel sheet¹, let alone your average Twitter tirade. Which is why I created this chart.

You might be wondering why I needed such a detailed map of political thought. Well, two reasons:

1. To remind myself (and now, you) that the world of political ideas is far bigger than “us vs. them.”

2. Because I desperately needed a way to make sense of all the madness while writing Bear Necessities of Politics and Power.

But why, Bear, why would you Excel us to death?

Because: political discourse today has been flattened into absurdity. Right-wing ideologues, in particular, love to claim ownership over ideas that aren’t theirs—freedom, patriotism, economic growth—while smearing everything else as part of some shadowy Marxist plot. They’ll tell you capitalism is the only way forward while sneering at countries with a mixed economy (like Germany or France). They’ll champion democracy as the pinnacle of civilisation while openly flirting with authoritarianism. And they’ll insist that multiculturalism is the source of all social ills, ignoring how culturally inclusive nations like Canada and Singapore thrive.

In short, they simplify politics because complexity is inconvenient. Nuance doesn’t fit on a bumper sticker or into a soundbite during Question Time. But politics isn’t just about picking sides—it’s about navigating the interplay between ideas like progressivism, federalism, environmentalism, and yes, even techno-optimism.

So, What’s the Chart For?

This chart is my attempt to show just how broad and overlapping political ideologies are. It’s not perfect (how could it be?), but it’s a reminder that the ideas shaping our world are too complex to be crammed into binary categories.

Want to understand why left-wing ideologies like eco-socialism and humanism are surging globally? The chart explains that. Curious about how nationalism and religious fundamentalism intertwine in certain parts of the world? It’s all there. Want to know why eco-fascism, a Frankenstein’s monster of environmentalism and authoritarianism, exists at all? Look no further.

And yes, there’s even room for things like techno-skepticism and liberation theology—two ideologies you’ll rarely hear about on talk radio but which are shaping debates significantly in their own quiet ways.

What I Hope You’ll Take Away

If nothing else, let this chart serve as a giant middle finger to anyone who insists that politics is simple. It’s not. It’s nuanced, contradictory, and downright chaotic. And that’s exactly why it matters so much.

So next time you hear someone nattering on about how “all liberals are the same” or how “socialism equals dictatorship,” send them this chart. Let them stew in the glorious spreadsheety-complexity, of it all.

1. And I tried - by Cher, I really, really tried.