Right-Wing America Has a Total Breakdown Over Brown Mayor, Film at 11

From “Marxist Takeover!” to “Thoughts and Prayers for NYC,” a guided tour through the most deranged reactions to Zohran Mamdani’s win, dedicated to my 416 American Readers

So, everyone will by now have heard that Zohran Mamdani - a Ugandan born Muslim man who is a socialist - has won the election to become the next Mayor of New York City.

This is, without a doubt, a monumental victory that’s worth being celebrated loudly - he ran a campaign of positivity and actively painted a vision of what socialism could look like.

Naturally, not everyone will be celebrating - every election does, of course, have a loser. However, I took a bit of time this afternoon I waded back into the cesspit that is now known as X to have a look at what some of our favourite foghorns of hate right-wing commentators had to say and… Good. God.

Good. God.

Immediately after publishing this, I will absolutely be going to wash myself down with the Middle-of-Lidl high-pressure spray, because it is gross. Gross as fuck.

So, without too much pre-amble (for a change), these are the most unhinged, completely insane reactions I’ve been able to find (so far).

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It absolutely baffles my mind how socialism gets treated like an airborne disease by commentators on the right, and Robby’s fannywobble in text here reads like an accountant’s variation of the book of Revelations - trans surgeries skyrocketing (unlikely), property values falling (no chance), landlords fleeing like startled pigeons (the problem being?)

Despite Robby’s fevered shout of panic, I have no doubt that New York City will survive.

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It honestly takes an impressive lack of proportion to compare a democratic election to a terrorist attack - but here we are. Logan has officially weaponised genuine grief from a truly horrific attacks into a moral compass that seems to point constantly at “OUTRAGE!!!” Somewhere, there is a Fox/GB News producer shouting “yes, yeees, that’s the reaction we’re trying to get!”

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When your entire personality is capitalism, it’s inevitable that even a rent cap looks like bolsheviks sharpening pitchforks getting ready for a revolution. The panic on display from Hannity is probably not so much about Marxism and more about the truly terrible idea that normal human beings working in New York may just one day be able to afford an apartment with windows.

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Every single far-right commentary account has the exact same two settings:

“STOP DIVIDING US BY RACE!”

And;

“LOOK AT ALL THESE BROWN PEOPLE DARING TO EXIST!”

It truly fascinates me how incredibly quickly “demographics” turns from a statistical measure to an existential threat the moment someone not named John Smith loses an election.

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The word “Marxist” to Mike “Trump is my Daddy” Johnson is just a magic word for “person who believes in bus funding.” This entire post of his reads like the minutes from a pretty indecorous nervous breakdown. I find it absolutely remarkable that a man from a party so obsessed with freedom has turned democracy itself into something they fear catching.

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Laura Loomer’s Twitter feed is where nuance goes to die, buried beneath no fewer than 7,000 American flags and multiple gallons of self-righteousness.

She’s one of those people who treats the mere existence of muslims as a domestic terror alert. “Islamic takeover”? It’s a mayoral election, Laura - not Call of Duty: Sharia Edition. Literally the only thing in full swing is her damned persecution complex.

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You can practically hear Matt shaking as he typed this - for Walsh, “third world” most likely just means “too many people who understand how to season food.” The man is utterly terrified that New York’s biggest crime is representation - to the point that somewhere a 1950s segregationist is whispering “steady on there, lad, you’re overdoing it a bit now.”

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Some context here for my American readers - this is a tweet from the same man who once raised a local posse of very anxious racists to stand on a beach and grunt at passing charity rowers because he mistook them as a small boat coming to invade Great Yarmouth, so it’s probably worth treating this warning with the scepticism it deserves.

I’m going to presume that he’s still haunted by this, so can to an extent understand why he’s in such a flap about both London and New York being led by brown men.

(Also, as someone who has lived in London for a decade, it’s probably more likely that you’ll have cleaner air and better bus services by the end of Mamdani’s term if Khan’s experience is anything to go by).

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Abbott here is treating the democratic election of a Muslim socialist like a natural disaster, and it is just so on brand. Also, “thoughts and prayers” - isn’t that what you tweet when you’ve just ignored another mass shooting?

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I’m not even sure what happened here.

It literally looks like John here is under the impression that the moment a Muslim man wins an election, the city this happens in instantly (poof!) turns into Agrabah. Camels, goats, veils - it’s literally the full-on Daily Mail/Fox News fever dream. None of this makes sense to be honest, and I can only suspect that this post was done purely with the purpose of leaving his followers turgid with annoyance about a place that they’ll likely never even go to.

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Aaaand, that’s me out of the cesspit. All of them truly seem to be that insane.

So, on that note, to my 416 American readers - thank you. You are, without a doubt, doing the lord’s work by being there and not screaming into a hedge on a daily basis. I honestly don’t know how you do it, but I salute you heartily and homosexually from this side of the Atlantic.

For today, we are all joining you in celebrating what was a monumental victory by Mamdani, and genuinely hope that there is more to come - not just for New York City, but for every place that has been told in the past year that compassion, equality and competence are somehow dangerous ideas. You are the proof today that the world hasn’t completely given up on decency just yet, and that maybe shouting about fairness can still beat shouting about fear.

Now go rest your heads, you’ve earned it - I’ll keep watch on my side of the ocean on the likes of Nigel Farage and Lee Anderson for you.

But before that, I’m going to go out on my balcony now and wait for my husband to come down to hose me down.

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